Tuesday, December 19, 2017

MLP Episode 723: Secrets and Pies

Twenty-two down, three to go. And now we're coming to one of the more... interesting episodes of season seven. Let's take a look at how I feel about Secrets and Pies.

Talk about a recipe for disaster. Did nobody, whilst proofreading, realize that the solution to this conflict was way too simple? Hell, it was obvious that Rainbow Dash was lying to Pinkie Pie even before the first act came to an end!

The first obvious sign that the episode is bad is the flashbacks; they are supposed to be in Pinkie's perspective, and yet we clearly see Rainbow Dash throwing the pies to the side. And not once does Pinkie become suspicious! She doesn't even ask if she ate the pans as well. I know Pinkie isn't the brightest bulb on a Hearth's Warming tree, but she is not this stupid and oblivious, and it's especially when you can see Rainbow Dash telling Pinkie to look away before throwing the pies away!

What makes it worse is that when Pinkie finally gets a clue, she constantly stalks and harasses Rainbow Dash to at least try one of her pies. So yeah; both characters are horribly unlikable, and it's the third to last episode of the season! Pinkie because she's a creepy, desperate stalker, and Rainbow Dash because she's an insensitive jerk!

And you know that makes Rainbow Dash even worse in this episode? She gives the pies to her pet tortoise and the class hamster (yeah, the latter was indirectly, but still), and it comes off as animal abuse! Does Equestria have no equivalent to the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA)? Apparently not, which is another unfortunate implication in an episode already loaded with them!

But do you know the most insulting part of the episode? It's the ending where Rainbow Dash tries to eat a pie so rancid that not even a hobo would want it! Yeah, Pinkie stops her, but it turns out that Rainbow Dash, rather than tell us why she doesn't like pies, admits that she did this to spare Pinkie Pie's feelings and... she forgives her friend... just like that?!

So, apparently, the moral seems to be, "You can lie about enjoying what your friend makes, and if they find out you were doing this to spare their feelings, it will all be okay in the end." That... is right up there with No Second Prances, Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep, 28 Pranks Later, and Fame and Misfortune in having some of the worst themes this show has ever displayed! And it all could've been avoided if Rainbow Dash was honest with Pinkie from the get-go!

If there was anything worth salvaging in this disgusting excuse for an episode, it's that Applejack and Twilight are actually likable here, more so than the episode's main stars.

Final Thoughts
This episode is just awful, plain and simple. I don't know why anybody would even want to watch this episode; the main characters are unlikable and unsympathetic, the solution was too obvious, and the morals are terrible. I would not recommend this to anybody at all. It's got no reason to exist, and is a complete insult to the show's general theme.

Rating: -5 out of 10

2 comments:

  1. I could already tell by the description this episode was terrible, sounded like a dumb G3.5 episode. I think I know what actually did this plot better: a doll booklet of one of the dolls from Rainbow Brite, Patty O'Green. The story went like this:

    "Canary Yellow bustled about her kitchen. She was baking lemon custard pies for Rainbow Brite and all her friends. "Oh," she thought as she took them from the oven, "these will be a treat!" She put the pies on her windowsill to cool and began cleaning her apartment for her afternoon guests.

    Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite were hiding outside Canary Yellow's kitchen window. When she left the room, they crept over to look at the pies. "Let's have some fun and play a joke on Canary Yellow," giggled Patty O'Green. She whispered a plan in Lucky's ear and the two mischief-makers took the pies and left.

    That afternoon, Canary Yellow's guests arrived. Everyone sat at her picnic table laughing and chatting. While Patty O'Green told a story, Lucky sprite sneaked to the kitchen and put the pies back in place.

    "I have a surprise for everyone!" Canary Yellow announced. She went to her kitchen and returned with the pies. "They're lemon custard," she beamed, "and I made them all by myself!"

    Everyone oohed and ahhed. Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite just smiled. Then, Red Butler cut open his pie. "This isn't lemon custard!" he cried. "Canary Yellow, this pie is green and it tastes awful!"

    Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite were beside themselves with laughter. All the pies were green! Canary Yellow was in tears. She'd worked so hard!

    "Come on, Canary Yellow. Don't cry!" Patty O'Green chided. "It was only a joke!" But no one else was laughing.

    Rainbow Brite shook her finger at the two tricksters. "This time you two have gone too far! You've hurt Canary Yellow‘s feelings."

    Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite hung their heads and walked away. "I feel terrible!" said Patty O'Green. "Jokes are no fun when they make someone else unhappy. We'll just have to find a way to make it up to Canary Yellow." Patty O'Green thought for a minute. "I've got it!" she cried. "We'll go right home and...", she whispered a plan in Lucky sprite's ear. Lucky sprite nodded his head with excitement and jumped up and down.

    Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite worked all night. By sunup, their work was done. They went back to Canary Yellow's apartment and hid in the bushes outside her window.

    Canary Yellow woke up. The sun was shining in her window and the scent of lime filled the air. "Uh oh," she said, sniffing. "I think Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite have been up to more tricks!" She got out of bed and went outside. "I better take a look," she sighed.

    What Canary Yellow saw astounded her! There were pies everywhere! Dozens of them and they smelled wonderful! "I don't believe it!" she cried.

    Just then, Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite popped out. "Surprise!" they shouted. "Listen, we're really sorry we ruined your party. We couldn't make the pies lemon again, so we made lots of lime ones instead!"

    "And invited all your friends!" added Rainbow Brite as they all popped out.

    "Oh, Patty O'Green and Lucky sprite!" Canary Yellow smiled. "This is the nicest trick you've ever played!" "

    Had Rainbow taken Patty's place, Pinkie Canary's and maybe Twilight as Rainbow Brite, and with some tweaking, it would have been better, and it wouldn't have resorted to using gross out humor making Rainbow look like she got covered in liquid diarrhea (I apologize if that's too foul)...

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  2. Why anybody would even want to watch this episode? Simply: it's funny. Pure cartoon. It is as simple as that.

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